my sisters under your porch take her home
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
