brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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