You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Randomize