should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
We were destined to go to rehab together
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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