I feel like abortions should bother me more
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
