So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize
