i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
