so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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