sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize