I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize