I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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