haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I could fuck to npr.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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