Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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