Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
