yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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