What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
