He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
