Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
So apparently I’m into choking now
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