We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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