Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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