I need to stop coming to work sober
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Randomize
