Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize