Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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