yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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