My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
