Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Enjoy the penises
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
