I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
