Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I love you.
Bad choice
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
