just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Randomize
