So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
