hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I'm at about main and main street
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
