Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
