Fine. I'll sleep in my office
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
