Can Purell be used as lube?
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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