did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
