i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
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