If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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