so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
