And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
