Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
This show inspires me to have sex in space
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Randomize