I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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