Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
there is puke in my bra ... again
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize