come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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