thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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