I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Randomize
