remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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