Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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