i don't plan on having that self control this summer
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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