Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize