i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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