she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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